Even Water Has a Smell

I remember the morning after Rich was born, I was full of so many different emotions. After all, he'd just come five weeks early. He was healthy and doing well, for which I was thankful. But he wasn't coming home with us, and that made me so sad. I cried and cried and cried when I thought about leaving my little baby at the hospital. (I'm sure my hormones didn't help, either.) 

But the feeling that was so prominent that morning, was that I missed Rich. I missed having him with me all the time. Safe inside me, protected from the world, still shielded and cared for by my body. And frankly, I felt a little gypped. I was supposed to have a month more with him. More time for him to grow. I was supposed to get (even) bigger, and (even more) uncomfortable. And I remember thinking, "Man, I can't wait to have this chance again, to have my baby with me, to be pregnant again." (Those hormones are killer, I'm telling ya.) 

Well. I'm here to say right now, on the record, so that I don't forget this the next time we are thinking about having a baby, that pregnancy (at least for me) is hard. I think that I really really forgot what a hard time I had with Rich.  

And one of the hardest things for me is that EVERYTHING has a smell. And every smell is so overwhelming. 

And this time around, one of the hardest smells that I have to deal with every day is the smell of the water here in Logan. 

Now, let's be clear. Before I got pregnant, I probably bragged about how good our water is. How fresh. How it comes from an aquifer and is one thing that the city of Logan is very proud of. (I mean, you should see our water bill.)

Maybe it's the winter pollution that we can't seem to shake. Maybe it's the fact that we're so close to the industrial part of Logan. But the water that comes out of our faucets, sits in our toilets, pours out of the shower heads, all smells. And it smells bad. 

Bad bad bad. 

Like, it's made me throw up many times. Too many times to count.

Showering is no longer a relaxing getaway. It's a how-long-can-I-stand-the-smell-combined-with-suffocating-heat-before-I-hurl adventure. Every time. 

Thankfully, when my mom was visiting, she had the foresight to buy us some water bottles. You know, for emergency preparedness. 

Well, I'm calling the smell of our water an emergency. 

I mean, I've had bad water before. I grew up in Texas. Where you could taste the lake the water came from (and not in a good way). 

But this--is torture.

I really think that once things warm up it'll improve. (The bitter winter cold seems to have trapped the pollution smells into the snow and city.) But till spring and summer come to my rescue, I'll be sticking to my bottled water. And holding my breath whenever I have to deal with Logan water. 

I'm not a big fan of soda

unless it is filtered through lots of ice.

And those giant ice cubes just don't cut it. 

With my pregnancy hormones being all wacky, I've had a hard time keeping drinks down (especially water). And drinks that are too sweet only serve to further upset my stomach. 

But sometimes, the carbonation in soda seems to help calm things down. However, soda can be too strong if it isn't filtered through some good-sized ice. (Good size meaning small. Pebble-sized. Is that what the ice I like is called? Pebble ice? That's what Tyler calls it.)

Anyway. Last night, around 10 PM, I had a minor emotional meltdown. Things have been hard (they are getting better though), and it all just hit me. I started crying and trying to explain what all was bothering me to Tyler. He calmly listened and rubbed my back through it all, being as understanding and helpful as he could. As I finally started to relax, I turned to him and said, "All I want is some tiny ice." 

Tyler, being the great guy he is, assured me that he would check at the store for some ice for me when he went to pick up some milk and Sprite. 

But stores don't sell the good kind of ice. I knew this, and Tyler knew this. So, I had no actual expectation for any tiny ice. 

A few minutes after I calmed down, Tyler headed out to the store. He was gone for a long time. So long, in fact, that I was starting to get worried. Just as I was about to enter panic mode, Tyler arrived home--with the ice I was wanting. 

As it turns out, Tyler had gone to the store, then made his way out to Sonic to pick up some ice. (Sonic ice, in case you've never had it, is the best kind of ice. It's tiny and porous and perfect.) As it happens, he arrived after Sonic had closed for the night, but managed to catch someone before they left. Happily, Tyler had some cash on him so that he could pay for the ice even though the computers were already powered down. 

And Tyler returned home the hero. 

I know this is a little thing. But it really meant so much to me. I started tearing up when I saw what he had done. I told Tyler it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for me. And in the moment, it really felt like it. 

Oh, Hey

I'm sure that some of you may have noticed that I haven't really been on here much lately. (Ok, ever.)

But I've been pretty sick these last few weeks. Nauseous. Throwing up. And just generally having a rough go of things.

Good thing I've had this cutie to keep me company.

Tyler thinks I need to be more specific.

Happy 2013!